[You need a title for your paper]
The American Dream is undoubtedly one of the major forces. [Remove the comma from here.]causing the United States [Delete this section.] that has always pulled crowds of immigrants, and now many students to apply for work permits, and many millions of people take part in a Green Card lottery. [This is unclear; did you mean "that has a pulled crowds of immigrants, and many students to apply for work permite, as well as have millions of people take part in a Green Card lottery.*]What is This phenomenon? Probably Everyone has their own definitions [definition] of "The American Dream." For some, this will be [is] a chance for a prosperous life, [Replace the comma with a semi-colon.]for others, political freedom, [Replace the comma with a semi-colon.]and for others-[Replace the dash with a comma] religious [freedom]. The American Dream is often associated with the saying "rags to riches," or the chance for a prosperous life through hard and persistent work.But the more Frequently [.] you can also meet with the conviction that the "American dream" is a chance for quick and easy money
As you can see.[to] give a comprehensive answer to the question about the essence of "The American dream" is not as simple. Moreover, it is as old as the United States, and its meaning has evolved with changing realities.
Most modern Americans agree that the "American dream" is primarily a chance for material success. But [However.] history shows that it was not always ["the case" or "true"]. The meaning of "The American Dream" in colonial times was associated closely with the Puritan ethics of the first European settlers. According to economic success it was a measure of grace. [Please clarify this sentence. It does not make sense as written.] Consumption was strictly
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Overall Comments
You have given a lot of information in regards to the American Dream. You have discussed both the historical and contemporary forms of this issue;good job!
Unfortunately, most of your sentences lack prepositions and articles in order for your sentencs to have clarity and flow. You can read more about this in the Grammar and Conventions section.
Thesis
The main idea of your paper is stated in the introduction;good job!
Content Development
You have given great examples of what the American Dream can mean to different people;
whether it is hard work and perseverance, or just luck, there is a strong driving force.
Conclusion
You have a good conclusion to your paper.
Grammar and Conventions
Article a
An aricle is a word that combines with a noun to indicate the type of reference being made by the noun. Articles specify the grammatical definiteness of the noun. In English, there are three articles;"a", "an", and "the"
Prepositions
A prepostion is a part of speech in tha introduces a prepositional phrase. For example, in the sentence "The cat sleeps on the sofa", the word "on" is a preposition, introducing the prepositional phrase "on the sofa". In English, the most used prepositions are "of", "to", "in", "for", "with" and "on". Simply put, a preposition indicates a relation between hings mentioned in a sentence.
Error: Purpose work was not to be a rich and live lavish lifestyle, but economic independence and social advancement.
Correction: The purpose of work was not to be rich and live a lavish lifestyle, but economic independence and social advancement.
It was nice working with your paper today. Good luck with your revision!
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